Today, as a consequence of my recent conversations, i thought i will write about the saga of bread winners who go abroad, alone.
In my small residential layout consisting of around 60 houses, we have 5 families where the bread winner is either abroad or in a different city, leaving the families behind. They have all gone into this arrangement thinking it was a temporary one, just for a few months, or years, just until so and so commitment is taken care of etc. But the months dragged into years, and there seems to be no return ticket. They participate in all the functions and birthdays via FaceTime or Skype, come home briefly and try to squeeze all the possible fun in a hectic week or ten days.
Gradually, the old parents, wives, children, all get adjusted into this new routine and eventually make peace with it too. However it is so difficult for the guy, who is toiling so hard in a foreign land, watching his life slipping by. When will he ever return? After he earns enough to close all his loans? After he saves enough to send his kids to college? After he saves enough for their marriage and his retirement?
How much is enough?
This is the question that pops up in many conversations these days. And there is no easy answer to that. No amount we ever make or save will ever be enough, unless we limit our wants.
Whenever I feel overwhelmed by these questions, a chat with my household always helps me to put things in perspective. She is the lone bread-winner for her family, after her husband passed away. She takes care of her old mother, two daughters and four grandchildren. They have their own house, so shelter is not a worry for them. The kids go to govt school, in case of emergencies her employers help her financially, and she is so content with her life. She always ends her chat with "vera enna ma vennum" meaning "what else do I need?' See the stark difference in the question?
The only answer to the difficult question of "How much is enough" is having appreciation and gratitude for the people and things that are good in your life. If one has that, they need not toil in foreign land, watching their entire youth and entire life slipping away.
In my small residential layout consisting of around 60 houses, we have 5 families where the bread winner is either abroad or in a different city, leaving the families behind. They have all gone into this arrangement thinking it was a temporary one, just for a few months, or years, just until so and so commitment is taken care of etc. But the months dragged into years, and there seems to be no return ticket. They participate in all the functions and birthdays via FaceTime or Skype, come home briefly and try to squeeze all the possible fun in a hectic week or ten days.
Gradually, the old parents, wives, children, all get adjusted into this new routine and eventually make peace with it too. However it is so difficult for the guy, who is toiling so hard in a foreign land, watching his life slipping by. When will he ever return? After he earns enough to close all his loans? After he saves enough to send his kids to college? After he saves enough for their marriage and his retirement?
How much is enough?
This is the question that pops up in many conversations these days. And there is no easy answer to that. No amount we ever make or save will ever be enough, unless we limit our wants.
Whenever I feel overwhelmed by these questions, a chat with my household always helps me to put things in perspective. She is the lone bread-winner for her family, after her husband passed away. She takes care of her old mother, two daughters and four grandchildren. They have their own house, so shelter is not a worry for them. The kids go to govt school, in case of emergencies her employers help her financially, and she is so content with her life. She always ends her chat with "vera enna ma vennum" meaning "what else do I need?' See the stark difference in the question?
The only answer to the difficult question of "How much is enough" is having appreciation and gratitude for the people and things that are good in your life. If one has that, they need not toil in foreign land, watching their entire youth and entire life slipping away.
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